Sunday, June 20, 2094
The Wilds Recorder
The Best Newspaper Out There
Carolyn's Corner
Dear Carolyn,
I am having love life problems. I know this girl, and she is beautiful in every single way. I truly love her. We danced last night, and it was wonderful, but it didn't end well. I decided to open up the can, and explain I was an Invalid. She seemed upset, scared of me even. I feel lost and alone, and I have no idea what to do! Please help me!
Sincerely,
Pouting in Portland
Dear Pouting,
What a brave soul you are to tell a girl something this serious! If I were you, I wouldn't have let her know that news so early in a relationship, but I can tell you care about her. Don't worry, for I can get you out of this mess! You must follow these steps exactly because this process could easily be messed up.
1. Slowly gain back this special girl's trust by dropping her sweet little notes. Think about a place she frequently walks by or looks at. An example could be:"I'm truly sorry, and I truly love you." She will have the breath knocked out of her! Any girl loves a humble apology. It might take a few tries, but she will forgive you.
2. Show her you want to protect her. After all, that's what I believe true love is, the willingness to give your life for someone. Think about situations where she might be in danger. Some examples are illegal parties, out past curfew etc. Be there to save her. Show her what you are willing to do for her. Besides, there is nothing more romantic than being saved by someone you just might love.
This is a picture of an illegal party that took place in Portland. Teenagers, boys and girls alike, get together and listen to forbidden music.
3. Lastly, and I mean lastly, after the other two steps have been completed successfully, complete this step. Bring her here.....to the Wilds. I know it is frightening, but it will most certainly seal the deal. Show her what it's like to fall in love without the constraints of society.
I wish you the best of luck in carrying out this process. I was touched by your letter, and you sound like a fine young man who can do this correctly.
Sincerely,
Carolyn
Our Biannual Protest = A Success
As they are trying to cover up what happened, here in the Wilds, we are celebrating!
As many of you know, just yesterday many Invalids jumped the border fence on the search for COWS! They cleverly dressed the cows in gowns identical to the children being evaluated that day. Some of the cows had been gussied up in wigs. Most importantly, on the cows had been written NOT CURE. DEATH. What a statement!
We can see from this that out here in the Wilds, we strongly believe that love ISN'T a disease, and every two years we come up with a way to get that across to the people of Portland.
What a sight it must have been. A very well known young man here in the Wilds, Alex, caught a front row seat to all of the excitement. He was there, in an evaluation room. He is brave, good-humored, and sly. He works as a guard in Portland, and in this case, he is an excellent source of information.
"I was standing there, up on the observation deck, and I could do nothing but laugh. Cows everywhere made this experience great, but the BEST part was the peoples' reactions. The evaluators were screaming and holding on to each other like they were going to die.The girl being evaluated quickly hid herself behind the surgical table. I really do hope we stirred something up in their hearts and minds."
He went on to further explain the girl being evaluated. Lena was her name. She was quiet, gentle, and nervous. Apparently, she had been screwing up her evaluation pretty badly. She said her favorite book was Romeo and Juliet, and that she thought it was beautiful. She stated her favorite color as gray. This shows that humans have natural tendencies to LOVE and we hope that these cows ignited that human tendency.
Romeo and Juliet, written by William Shakespeare. This book is commonly used in schools in Portland to show the effects and dangers of falling in love. Here in the Wilds, we believe just what Lena said. It is a story that shows the true beauty of love.
It is important that the other side of the story is explained so that we know what we're up against. Portland news reporters are covering up the case by saying that cows intended for the slaughterhouse got mixed up with a shipment of pharmaceuticals. Our spies have declared that we aren't in any huge danger with the Portland Regulators, as long as they stay undercover and are extra careful not to get caught.
This was a very risky protest to undertake, but it is very easy to say that it was a HUGE success! The evaluations have been pushed to a later date. We can only hope that those DON'T go well.
Bye for now!
New Movie Receives Great Reviews
Lauren Oliver published a book last year titled Delirium, and it shocked us all. It is extremely exciting that this heart-warming story has come to the big screen, and I have to say that it does the book justice. Although, I was disappointed that they left out certain details. Some examples are Lena's graduation, her bad dreams, and her preparation for the evaluation. However, the overall plot stayed the same which was very important.
The movie is creatively started in the evaluation room and after Lena (Anne Hathaway) says her favorite color is gray, the shot cuts to Lena running. She explains her life and sets up the story for us. For 64 years love has been considered a disease, and she can't wait to be cured.
This is a snapshot of the panel of evaluators that Lena goes before in the movie. This is quite realistic. The teenagers that go before them are asked many questions. With that information, the evaluators do things like match them up with a husband or wife and decide how many children they will have.
This idea changes as Lena falls in love with a boy named Alex (Charlie McDermott) who is an Invalid. He goes against society and hasn't been cured. Lena's whole view of the world is altered as she gets infected with this "disease". She struggles with her feelings as her best friend Hana (Hilary Duff) grow apart, she thinks of her dead mother, and she is bounded by the constraints of society.
I am quite honest in saying that I thought the cast was a bit quirky, but I was proven wrong. Anne Hathaway and Charlie McDermott did a beautiful job of showing the audience what true love is. I was quite surprised at McDermott. In his current television series, he is a college boy who has a bad attitude. He has proven he can be a mature actor. Megan Follows fulfilled her character as Aunt Carol. I am so glad to see her back on the stage. Jim Carrey as Uncle William provided the comic relief flawlessly. The cast worked together like nothing I could have ever imagined.
The director, Anne James, had great style in her very first film. My favorite thing she did was highlight the change in mood so vividly. Her use of color in the beginning was dark and gloomy. When Lena truly fell in love, everything turned bright and joyful. That is the mark of a fabulous director.
The themes of love and sacrifice made this movie amazing. I strongly encourage you to watch it and see why we protest the cure.
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What Happened Over the Fence last night?Find out in the
feature article!
This is a portion of the border that wraps around the USA. They decided to close their borders years ago. The citizens are told that it is electrical, but we all know that that's not true!
Anne Hathaway
LenaFantine in Les Miserables
Charlie McDermott
Alex
Axl Heck in The Middle
Hillary Duff
Hana
Lizzie McGuire in Lizzie McGuire
Megan Follows
Aunt Carol
Anne in Anne of Green Gables
Kaitlyn Maher
Grace
President's Daughter (voice) in Freebirds
Toby McGuire
Brian Scharff
Spider Man in Spider Man
Candace Cameron Bure
Rachel
DJ in Full House
Daryl Sabara
Drew
June Cortez in Spy Kids
Hector ElizondoGuard at Wilds Fence
Joe in Princess Diaries
Kate Fleetwood
Lena's Mom
Factory Woman #1 in Les Miserables
Lilliana Mumy
Jenny
Lucy in Santa Clause
Jim Carrey
Uncle William
Bruce in Bruce Almighty
Chris Pine
Regulator 1
Nicholas Devereaus in Princess Diaries 2
Jerry Trainor
Regulator 2
Spencer in iCarly
Patrick Stewart
Regulator 3
Jean-Luc Picard in Star Trek: The Next Generation
WE WANT YOU............................................URGENT
Even though we all enjoy joking around about it, to relieve our stress and anxiety; the cure is a very real thing that is consuming society as we know it. It is terrible that we watch person after person go under the knife only to come out unable to love.
BUT NEVER FEAR! The Wilds have created a resistance. THAT'S WHERE YOU COME IN! WE NEED EVERYONE!
Men, women, teens, adults, cured and uncured, WE NEED YOU to take positions in Portland as regulators, police officers, government officials, scientists, and students. All we need is a willing attitude. We will give you instruction on what to do. If interested, call 972-888-9126 toll free.
Help us spread the resistance across the US. Help us end the cure once and for all.
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