Expectations of Lovedisclaimer: this is a project for school
Love, everyone wants to be loved. Even at a very young age, we were exposed to fairytale romances like Cinderella, Snow White, and The Little Mermaid. Where are my ladies that love romance movies?! Why do we love them so much? It may be because we love that tingly feeling it gives us or because we love fantasizing that we will find love like the people in the movie did. Romance movies and novels have the power to instill unrealistic expectations of love. According to Jeremy Nicholson, a social and personality psychologist, having these expectations may lead to future relationship problems. Women have noodle brains and think far more in depth into things compared to boys. We may be asking for too much too soon. Not saying that it is all our fault. Don't get me wrong, a guy has to know how to treat their ladies! Joann White, a relationship expect and psychology instructor from Temple University in Philadelphia, says "people want to rush into a relationship and they want it all to work out right away. They become very concerned if the other person doesn't call them quickly or doesn't want to see them with increasing frequency." Truthfully, I am guilty of being one of those people when I was younger. Thankfully I got some sense knocked into me! For me, I was so anxious to see when he would text me back. Nowadays with text, it is so simple to not reply and ignore a message.
In many situations, one partner wants to go at a more moderate pace than the other. Being swept up by a romantic gesture isn't an awful thing, just as long as we do not subject our partner to our fantasies too soon. If there is a desperation to get things moving too fast, this can chase the other one away.
Colette Bouchez says experts thinks it all comes down to old-fashioned guidelines:1. Do not rush into sex
2. Let the relationship slowly over months
3. Think about what you bring to the relationship, not what you get from it
4. Understand that heated passion may not last long, but love does
5. Work through problems to have a stronger relationship at the end
If you ask me, I think its a load of crap!
In a movie, the couple who had just met have sex after their first or second date. That's not right! A typical movie is about two hours, so of course directors have to squeeze the entire span of a relationship into a couple of hours, but it messes with our brain. It's as if, for a relationship to have a happy ending, you need to have sex.
Psychologist Lauren Brockie explains that the sexual connection between characters in a movie are so intense that it is powerful enough to imprint in our minds what love is like or "should be." People idealize the relationship between a couple from a movie until real relationships can't compete anymore. Why do we love romance movies and conjure love fantasies? Women are wired for emotional connection. This is why we crave the eager anticipation, and the mental and emotional longing for passionate movies like A Walk To Remember. Watching these movies may start out as a harmless guilty pleasure, but it can easily become an unhealthy obsession by hoping that real life can be like the movies.
Can there really be love at first sight? I believe people have an initial attraction to someone, but love...no. It takes time to truly love someone and one look is not going to do anything except maybe give you the courage to pursue them. There are many that disagree with me and claim they have experienced "love at first sight." I think those are instances of sexual attraction. First things first, let's break it down. According to Elliot D. Cohen, who is the president of the Institute of Critical Thinking, says merely seeing someone doesn't support an adequate window into the nature of the person. For example, seeing Zac Efron in The Lucky One is not a basis for loving him. The characters actors and actresses play are most likely just that, characters. Fans may be infatuated with actors and actresses, but they cannot say they truly love them because they don't really know them. Comparable to the "love at first sight" notion, you can't say that you love someone just from seeing them because you don't legitimately know them yet.
The Lucky One is about a man named Logan who is a marine soldier. He found a photo of a woman, whose name is Beth, that was just lying on the ground. Just after he found the photograph, there was an explosion and he was lucky enough to survive the blow. Once he returned home, he vowed to himself that he would find the woman from the photo and thank her for saving his life. First of all, she didn't save his life, he saved his own life. His body was strong enough to withstand that explosion. The fact that he wants to find that Beth to thank her is fine, whatever. Of course, Logan finds her at a dog training farm she owns with her grandma. He starts to work for them and obviously,
Guard your heart and don't waste time fantasizing about a spotless fairytale ending. By expecting your love life to be like the movies, you're basically setting a ticking time bomb for the relationship to end tragically. Remember that everything happens for a reason. Romance movies are a guilty pleasure, but be cautious to not craveunrealistic expectations of love.
Logan and Beth find themselves in a relationship. Eventually, Beth discovers that Logan deliberately searched for her. If this were real life and I was her, I would be extremely uncomfortable. That's just strange and creepy! I think any woman would feel uneasy and violated.
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